Monday, March 23, 2015

Funny Little One-Line Jokes

Funny one-line jokes.  (Extracted from a longer list handed to me in a steathily camouflaged bible tract promoting mostly the ugliness of man.)
  1. If at first you don't succeed, avoid skydiving.
  2. Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
  3. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute.
  4. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  5. Always remember that you are unique; just like everyone else.
  6. Consciousness:  That annoying time between naps.
  7. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
  8. I started out in this world with nothing, and I still have most of it.
  9. The severity of the itch is inversely correlated to your ability to scratch it.
  10. You can't have everything.  Where would you put it?
  11. I just let my mind wander and  it's yet to come back.
  12. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
  13. It's bad luck to be superstitious.
  14. What would happen if you were to get scared half to death twice?
  15. Everywhere is walking distance if you have enough time.

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